Lately.

October has completely flown by!! If every day left of this deployment goes like this, he will be home tomorrow it seems! It may have been that I was so busy...but not really. So what has been up with us?

Well for one, I've FINALLY started my doula training! I'm training through DONA and I have my training conference this weekend! Excited doesn't even begin to start covering the way I feel! Birth has ALWAYS been such a fascinating and amazing event to me and now? It will be my job to help mom and dads through this life changing event! HOW COOL!

Jon is still deployed, as to be expected :) We're going on 11 months! :O Almost at the end, though :) I have taken to the deployment surprisingly well. At first, the x number of months (more than a year) seemed extremely daunting. I've done weeks and a few months, but over a year?! I guess I took it a little better since I have expected this. When I agreed to marry Jon, I agreed to marry the Army as well. Most military wives would agree. His job HAS to come first. And I'm okay with that.

We're still preparing for our little baby. We figured it won't be long (Lord willing) until we have a little one ourselves, so we want to get prepared while he is away and we have the money!! Cloth diapers, breast pumps...the works ;) ACTUALLY we got our breast pump from my friend who is moving and only used it twice! $100 for over $300 worth of products?! YES! And as for cloth diapers- I am so passionate about NOT using disposables. You can look up all the nasty things in disposables on your own, but I will never, ever put that on my babies skin. Nasty. Also, I am going to start watching a little girl during the week starting in January (and a little boy at night twice a week!) so we are getting a pack and play and a swing for them, as long with toys. That way we'll have that marked off as well! AND YES, there are items people can still get us when I do become pregnant ;)

Speaking of getting pregnant, my doctor and I have begun "prepping" my body for a baby! I have started my prescription of prenatal vitamins, started taking B6 so shorten my luteal phase, I have started eating right with high omega's and I have begun exercising. We are trying to do our part with no medical intervention. There are quite a few fertility problems that are in my family so we want to get everything "right". The Lord is in control though, so we are just praying and "having fun" as we like to say :)

Halloween was a ton of fun! My aunt does her house up big and her yard all scary like. Not really my style- but everyone LOVES it! My cousin, who is my other half, and I were fifties housewives! It was quite the scene ;) Next year, Jon and I want to have a fun get together as well. I love making goodie bags and baking up a storm so that will be NO problem!

As far as Stampin Up is concerned, my business is kind of at a stand still until I can get more paper! :\ everyone keeps telling me to "jump in!" but I can't work like that. I have to have everything in a row and organized, then it's full game! Hopefully by the beginning of the year!!

Our "Child Plan" ;)

Again, same concept as the "Birth Plan", but how we plan to implement childhood!

We plan to do child led weaning in the breastfeeding department. I view it more as a connection and special time, than strictly nutritional. Every child weans and every child loses their latching ability, so it WILL end. However, at this time, I can't really see me doing it any further than three. But you never know what may happen! I want to nurse on demand for the first two years, then after only at sleep times or when necessary. I want to pump as well on a schedule of 10, 12, 2, and 4. I've known a few people who say that this is a great schedule and you get at least two bottles worth a day! Of course, this won't always be workable, but that's why this is a FUTURE plan ;) Whatever excess we don't use within that month or don't plan to use, I will donate to Mother's Milk Bank. I'd love to help an adoptive mother out for her new baby!

We also plan to cosleep. We will have an Arms Reach Cosleeper attached to the side of the bed on my side, but I can guarantee (s)he will end up in the bed with us at some point! We would like to pacify while sleeping to sooth any urge to suck while sleeping. Hopefully the space between us in the cosleeper will help out when they are older so they can sleep more soundly, if not, they're only little once! :) I also want a nap nanny for the first four months to prevent colic!

As far as education, this is where my expertise comes in from my degree. I would be really interested to start Your Baby Can Read with them once (s)he is four months old! I know it seems kind of extreme, I agree, but on of my close friends has used it on her son and he is now two, can read books and LOVES it! She even made a reward chart and he walked over, read the reward chart and then yelled because it didn't say "no yelling" on there!! ;) I guess it has it's advantages and disadvantages! I do not plan to make it like a chore, however. I want to make it fun and in no way a fight. We will also begin sign language around this age. Once they turn two we will start sensory projects and then three and four will be "preschool". We plan to homeschool so our preschool will be a far cry from traditional preschool, and that's how we like it :)

Once solid foods come into play we want to make our food. Why? Well, one, it's far cheaper than store bought food! Two, YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING IN IT! And you can make your own adjustments for what you want! We will start cereal very seldom at five just to test out her reflexes, then vegetables, then fruit, then mix, then meat :) We also would like to implement child lead weaning in this area and allow them to use a mesh feeder and steamed veggies! This can also be a huge time saver when you need to get the kitchen cleaned or eat dinner yourself!

Other than that? I have no clue. As I said, this is just a plan and will be very funny to see how everything pans out once we actually have one! :) But in no means do I think this is unattainable! I have known many to follow a similar plan or even more extreme, so I'm pretty confident. Never say never, right?! :)

Our "Birth Plan" ;)

So. I had this thought that sometime in the (near?) future we will have a little baby :) And that idea makes me all kinds of happy. So then I start fantasizing my "ideal baby" or I guess our ideal plan, since our baby will be perfect whichever kinda way it is! I thought it would be funny to look back on what my plan would be while I was still baby...less?

First the pregnancy:

I am terrified of having problems with my pregnancies. My mom never had miscarriages, nor has anyone in my family (knowingly), so that sort of calms my anxiety. I plan on taking the natural route in my pregnancy and child's life so that takes some planning. I have a list of techniques to use for nausea and queasiness so I feel good about that aspect! I will drink 64oz of water a day, filling my Nagalene up twice. I will keep my protien count for the day between 75 and 100 to ward out pre-eclampsia and other problems that would arrise! I plan to continue exercising throughout my pregnancy with prenatal yoga and pilates as well :) Around 34 weeks we will have our maternity pictures done by the wonderful Jessica Smith and they will be gorgeous, fitting in perfectly with all of her other stunning pictures. I plan to take herbal supplements and flower essences to get through the long ten months of pregnancy and travel an hour to Bettie Sheets' office in the Northern Neck for my care! I will go to Fun Fetal Photos at 18 weeks and again at 32 weeks for a sneak peak at our little one since our midwife doesn't do ultrasounds!

Now the birth:

I want a homebirth. Sooo bad. I will use Bettie Sheets as my midwife and Amara as my doula. Kimberlin Gray will be my birth photographer because money won't be an issue ;) I will use aromatherapy and the Bradley Method to get through the surges of labor. The birth pool will be in the living room with candles lit all around the room. It will just be me, my husband and our labor team. It will be a deeply personal, very life changing moment. I would labor in the pool, standing up and squatting, allowing gravity to do it's work! We will welcome a gorgeous baby into this world and it will be every bit of paradise. We will then find out the gender of our first born! We will wait for the cord to stop pulsing and (s)he will latch on immediately. (S)he will nurse while I naturally deliver the placenta, which we will later encapsulate. We will have a wonderful birth bonding experience and then we will go into an herbal sitz bath together and I will clean him up. I will then put a kissaluvs fitted diaper on with a pair of wool longies and a cute shirt. He will get weighed and get the specs done, then come back to nurse, while this is going on, my husband will call family to come and visit with the new baby! After the ooh and ahh's are done, we will fall asleep as a family.

The Fourth Trimester:

Between family, an amazing husband and a postpartum doula, I will sleep when the baby sleeps. I will make sure I get my 9-10 hours of sleep a night/day to maintain my mood. I will nurse on demand and we will cosleep with the Arms Reach Mini Cosleeper and Nap Nanny. I will wear our little one around the house and on our walks in either our Sakura Bloom, Moby, or Boba Wrap (formerly Sleepy Wrap) and I will love it so. I will not shut myself in the house, but I will remain cautious and keep germy hands off my baby. I will again use aromatherapy and exercise to ward off any signs of baby blues, as well as keep my herbal supplements and omega-3's high! I will pump on a schedule 10am, 12pm, 2pm, 4pm for a reserve in the freezer for date night/weekends. We will also cloth diaper using a mix of prefolds and fitteds with wool covers at home and Grovia and gDiapers while out. I also would love to get the baby adjusted at the chiropractor (along with me) about two months postpartum! You have to think of everything that baby goes through during pregnancy THEN during labor! As well as all the stuff YOU get kicked and punched! :)

I have a very active imagination, can you tell? ;) I think it would be funny to look back on this next year (maybe?) when we are beginning to welcome our little one into a new life!

and yes. I do have a list and plan on how we implement all of these things (aromatherapy, supplements, exercise). I like being prepared ;)

Living a life of Biblical finances.

Lord knows my husband and I are...irresponsible with our finances.

And there is NO excuse for it. Jon is deployed. We have more money than we ever have. We should have a hefty savings account. We should have money left in our checking account. We should have our debt paid off. We should be being responsible and preparing our future, especially with how unpredictable our futures all are. But we aren't.

We have debt out of our ears from when Jon lost his job for a little over 8 months when we first got married. Many things we had financed ended up on our credit report fast. We always make bills now, but then the extra money is our fun money. Fun money that is spent immediately. A lot of this falls on my hands because Jon has a set amount he uses each month (sometimes more, sometimes less). An excuse I could use is that we had so little for so long. We never got to have that cute little decorated house I had dreamed of when we got married. Sure Jon had the Reserves, but often times that paycheck would be taken to pay off something or another and we would get nothing. We lived off my minimum wage job where I was lucky to get 20+ hours, random side jobs and a $300 payment from our roommate to cover everything: rent, power and water. That was our life. You would think that would scare us straight.

We both have problems with wanting what our parents have, I guess. We want to have "the good life". That is one of our faults. We look at having left over money as a way to upgrade our lives. We want, want, want instead of save, save, save. We want the new fishing or scrapbooking thing we saw the other week that we didn't think we'd ever have money for. We want a new computer. We want a new bedset. We want. And that needs to stop.

I think we have a problem with being content. We have a comfortable 2 bedroom, 2 bath apartment. We don't need more. It's just us. We have a nice TV that we got as a wedding gift, we dont need a new one or a stupid 3D one. We have everything we need. We have so much that most don't. We really need to realize that.

So I have decided to get in control of our finances. And thus, start a finance series as I learn! I am taking a Crown Financial class and reading Your Money Counts by Howard Dayton. The Bible has over 2, 350 verses on money and possessions so it is obviously important. So it is long time that we take it over.

I have made some personal goals!

1. Get out of debt. We will be saving $1,000 at a time. Each time we meet this goal, we will pay off a large debt! Each month also, we will pay $100 toward a debt payment starting with the lowest debt. Making a snowball effect that will keep us going!

2. TITHE. This is really number one, but not necessarily where the most of our money will be going to. We need to trust God with His money. Everything we get and own comes from him and instead of being selfish with it, we need to be thankful and give back. That's the rule he has laid down in the Bible. We will tithe at least the 10% that is in the Bible, but if we are called to give more there will be no second doubt.

3. Save. I would like to have three savings accounts. One for debt, one for "fun" and one for the future. I'm not entirely sure how much we should be saving for the last two, I think that will be decided on when we see how much we have left after tithing and paying off debt. I know for our future savings account will be used as our emergency fund- which I would like to have at least $10,000 cash in the bank. My idea is to save for our car, save for our house and save for our futures.

4. Both have 675 credit scores. I don't have a credit score. My husband's isn't brag worthy at all. Our debt is holding us into this place. This is where I am border line with credit cards. I feel that if you use credit cards the wrong way, that is detrimental in life. If you are just charging because you don't have the money- that is bad. But when your engine breaks and you have no other way to get home or get a new engine, it can be a blessing. Granted when you have your emergency fund in place, that will be easy peasy to pay back. And that's the idea. Charging what you already have the money for, paying it back, and building credit.

That is our initial plan. Once we have these done we will re-evaluate and make a new plan that includes building more savings, investing, and starting our kids accounts. We would love to have their college paid for of course, but at least a "dowry" for when they get married :)

I also plan to take Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace seminar after this and continue on. For now though, we are incorporating his Baby Steps in our plan as well :)

This is a great video explaining Dave Ramsey's study. It's worth the watch!

When the unthinkable happens.

What happens when you don't understand anything that is happening and why?

What happens when the unthinkable happens?

That was exactly where I was a little over a month ago.

When we lost our little Alexis Rae.

Only the Lord knows what happened to her. All we know is that she got very sick, very sudden and it all happened very fast. That is not supposed to happen. This was a joyous occasion for my cousin and her family. This was a joyous occasion for everyone. She was and still IS perfect. In every way imaginable. Those 24 days were the biggest blessing to our family than we could ever fathom.

Her small hands, her tiny feet, her sweet cuddly personality- they were all here for a purpose. There were here to make us realize there will always be more love to go around. She was here to make us realize how precious life really is. She was here to make us realize God's true love.

Those 24 days were all here with a purpose- like all of us are. This purpose has shown brighter than anyone could expect. She has brought SO many people to the Lord, when they have had nothing else to depend on. Her own father has been to church for the past FOUR Sundays when in their eleven year marriage, he has only been twice. And today? He bought a Bible. That alone brings the biggest tears to my eyes. That he knows the Lord loves him and he will do anything to see his baby girl again one day.

The Lord has always been near through this experience. With a family with just enough money to make bills and an occasional fun day, they were able to raise money for all funeral expenses and current medical bills. They recieved checks and cash from people they didn't even know, just from people hearing their heartbreaking story from friends and family who were hurting right along with them. It was remarkable.

While Alexis was in CHKD prayers were nationwide. A text chain that went around the world held her name. Churches in over five states had prayer circles. Women's ministries raised money and prayed over it. Never did the Lord leave our side. Never. He was always there.

Sometimes life doesn't make sense. Sometimes things happen that seem to hurt so bad- there can't be any good. It's those situations that the Lord created for you to lean on Him. For you to let Him show you His goodness and love. I have a whole new idea of the phrase "If He brought you to it, He will bring you through it". That is exactly what happened in this situation. He is good. All the time.

A birth announcement.

Alexis Rae

7/6/11

5lbs 6oz

20" long

and perfect.

She was 6 weeks early and had to be delivered via c-section due to placenta previa. If anyone knows me, they know this girl and her sister are my WORLD (cousins babies whose like my sister). They are my children while I do not have any. I would give my soul to these girls and let me just say, she's doing great.

I love her so much.

And this girl?

Couldn't be happier.

And no, it's not the popsicle that makes her this happy! It's her "bebe didder".

A series of events!

Hey! Guess what??? I got a computer!

A house computer. Which means the chances of the charger cable coming undone is... non-existent! YAY for stability! And yay for internet. And for my blog.

I'm done.

Wanna know how I got internet back up?

HE'S HOME!!!!! For two weeks, but those two weeks are going to COUNT!!

He came home on July 8th at 3:48pm.

I take pride in knowing exactly what time!

Also something exciting?

Baby Lexi came out just in time to say HIII!

All in a weeks time!